~Yet another day~

So I'm blogging again in my lab..
After browsing FB & Twitter and the horoscope-of-the-day at The Star..
Sounds like I'm so freaking free huh?
I can't say I'm really busy like I was last year,where I have to produce results for conference.
This year, I can do experiment at my own pace, which is like..every morning..
They say I'm the most not-busy member of all, hohoho, they should have met the seniors last year.


Not trying to defend myself.
Just a smile and go along with it.
Every year it's the same. When I'm free, the rest are busy.
And when I'm freaking busy, alone and all, the rest will be busy karaoke-ing, watching movie etc.


Why it happens you ask?
Because the seniors and juniors one year above and below me go through the same courses;
When they have classes, I don't.
And when they don't have classes, I do.
It's the system in my university I guess.


So back to the point.
Now that everyone is busy with their coming exam,
I'm free to do my own stuff.
Which is like..journal translation from English to Japanese
Doing a power point about the journal 
Doing experiments on days which I don't have part time job.
And also studying for JLPT N1.
Which exam is on 1st of July.


That's all I guess.
Felt so drained out even though I had been eating well.
Not sure about sleeping well though.
Still having shoulder aches even after changing 2 pillows and changing the mattress
Gahh.


I guess I need to pick up my pace already.
The lab presentation is next month.
Sigh.

夜有所思

 以前的我，非常在意一些琐碎事物，在意别人的眼光，更在意朋友与他们的一切。
 也在意自己的思考，思绪及想象力。 

  不知何时开始，在乎的，只有回家看电视剧的时间，更珍惜睡眠时间；一些不需要动脑筋的事情。。 一整晚与朋友在MSN闲聊，时不时打电话给朋友嘘寒问暖，写写信寄明信片，已不是我的作风。

 说实在，有比较喜欢现在的生活吗？没有。
那为何会变这样？

 “忙碌”

 不是借口，是成长以后所面对的事实。
 随着年龄的增长，“忙碌”是无可逃避的一个现实。
 因为忙碌，所以疲乏。
因为疲乏，所以想休息。
 因为想休息，所以不想动脑筋，所以懒散。

为何不喜欢这样的生活方式？
 因为疲乏的躯体，疲惫的身心，
让我觉得无法集中，让我无法控制自己的思绪，让我觉得...

很老，很无奈，很陌生

 应该要重新整理一番了，岁月不留人，总不该浪费自己的人生做她所谓的“金钱的奴隶”吧？ 


觉悟。

~Hmm~

Worked for 11 hours average for 3 consecutive days.
I guess I'm just trying to earn as much as money as I can before I quit in July.
Having worked here for 3 years, felt really reluctant to leave.
But still I have to..if not I couldn't enjoy my last holidays as a student.
Or concentrate in my final thesis and research.
Or do anything for myself.
Or even think, ponder and reflect on myself, my life, my future.


It suddenly occur to me that I'm already 26.
Friends in the US are earning big bucks as bankers, auditors etc.
Even friends in Malaysia are earning big bucks as insurance agents and so on.
I'm getting jitters about working in real life. 
THE life, where I had heard from all the complaints from my friends, while I nodded in silence.


All this while, student life is what I have known and where I have been comfortable in.
The realisation that all this will end within ONE year.
Is like someone giving my stomach one big blow.
Took my breath and energy away all of a sudden.
Maybe it isn't so bad. Maybe not.
But the thought of it itself, scares me for the moment.


That said.
I'm off to vacation for a week tomorrow.
As I have promised myself in my previous blog.
Only, I'm not going alone.


I'm so looking forward to it=)